Tuesday? Oh, next Tuesday.

Yeah. So it's been over a week since I've written in my stupid little blog thing. I was so disappointed when I started writing this. I was going for a new record. Oh well, now everyone (sweatman and computer geek) can read what I've been up to. Last week was auditions for the 2005 Pius X musical, Bye Bye Birdie. This is what I have to say on the matter: this is the stupidest, most appalling musical I have ever encountered in my entire life. What kind of a methamphetamine user comes up with a five minute song with only one lyric: Ed Sullivan? Ed Sullivan. That's it. Pass out the Tonys, Oscars, Grammys, and the complimentary Bubble Yum. By the way, if anyone offers you a VHS copy of the movie version taped off of the Disney Channel in 1991, take it. First call the number on your screen to tell Walter's frozen head how craptastic his movie is, then throw it in the fire to burn for heat. You'll need the thermal comfort after we put on this musical; the pure evil of it will thrust us into a nuclear winter from which only Ed Sullivan could save us. I guess it is kinda cool I get to play more than one part, just like last year where I had three different roles in the Music Man. That rocked my island. The theatre people, however, all of which requested to be anonymous, don't particularly like me, hence my Tom Hanks audition but my Hayden Christensen part. But I will dominate. What is domination, you ask? You know that large chicken pizza Tony and I dominated at Old Chicago? That was, or is, domination. I know I am really defining domination as domination, and I'm using circular logic to dominate your mind, but it was all worth it in the end, because I get to make fun of George Lucas's casting abilities. On a side note, I watched Ed throw an empty bottle and witnessed it drilling a girl in the face; unintentional direct hit. Hahah, it sure was funny. I am cutting this post short due to time. Perhaps I will write tomorrow, but if I beat my old record of eight days without blogging I'll get a prize. Hey, did you ever play 500 outside and then shout, "prize box!" It was always a lifetime supply of toilets. -Matt